Chapter 107

Posted: November 28, 2015 in My Life Caught on a Silver Camera, Uncategorized

My legs felt weak as I got closer to the door. The feeling in them was rapidly decreasing as I latched myself onto the wall for support. With my hand pressed against the wall I made my way to the door and let myself in. Everyone was there. And everyone looked just as devastated as the last. I only made it a few steps in before they noticed me.

“Where is she?” I asked desperately.

Their heads slowly turned towards her bedroom and I found myself in a half jog. The second I turned the corner my hand made its way to my mouth as my eyes landed on her. Ash rocked her back and forth in his arms while sobs echoed from her chest. In her hand she held Rebel’s blanket.

Ash’s ear twitched as he heard me take a step forward. When his eyes met mine they were stained with blood. A small smile graced his lips as he looked up at me. “Hi Will.” His voice was hoarse and he coughed slightly to clear it. “It’s nice to see you.”

I tried to smile back but nodded instead. He slowly motioned for me to come closer and I cautiously took a seat on the edge of the bed.

Ash’s hand gently patted Trixi’s shoulder to get her attention. “Trixi.” He said softly. “Will’s here.”

She shook her head into his chest. “I can’t look at her. Everyone hates me!” She cried.

“No one hates you.” He cooed and kissed her hair. “You did the best you could.” A stream of tears fell down his cheek as he tried to keep himself strong. This was breaking him. Everyone knew how much he loved Rebel. But everyone also knew how much he loves Trixi. And seeing her like this was slowly tearing him even more apart.

I leaned over to tap him on the shoulder. “Why don’t you go get some air for a bit?” I whispered. “I’ll take care of her for now.”

He slowly nodded his head as he gently unwrapped her arms from around him. “I’ll be right back, T.” He said before leaving. As he left everyone else found places to sit and stand within the bedroom. I quickly slid next to Trixi as she stared down at the floor.

Everyone was silent. No one knew what to say. But I mean, what could you say? How could you possibly know what to say in a situation like this?

“I’m sorry.” Trixi’s small voice broke through the silence. It was weak and sounded like it pained her to speak. “I’m sorry I couldn’t save her.”

We all looked at her with hurt in our eyes.

“Trixi, there’s nothing for you to be sorry about.” Patricia said softly. “You did the best you could.”

“Stop it!” She screamed. “I’m tired of hearing that line! If I tried the best I could she’d still be here with me! And she’s not. Because she’s with them! Because her mother is a horrible person and couldn’t even fight hard enough to keep her!” Tears poured from her eyes in a constant stream. “Because of me she’s gone! And she’s never coming back!”

Her body slowly keeled over as she started shaking. I gently wrapped my arms around her just as fresh sobs began to echo within the room.

“Why did this have to happen to me?” She sobbed. Her words were muffled by her own crying. Her head fell into my chest as she continued to speak. “What did I ever do to deserve this? I didn’t do anything wrong?!” She picked her head up and looked at me, her eyes completely drenched in pain. “I never asked for their help, Will. If I had died that night none of this would of happened! I never deserved to live!”

“Stop it.” I scolded her. “Don’t say things like that.” Skylar quickly put his hand on my shoulder to stop me but I pushed it off. “Whether you became a vampire or not, you still deserved to live.”

“But-“ I shook my head at her to cut her off before grabbing her hands. Her eyes widened as I looked into them seriously.

“You’re a good person, Trixi. And we know you loved Rebel. We know you loved her so much more than you ever thought possible. And it showed every single time you looked at her. You couldn’t have ever possibly been a better mother to that girl because you already were the best. I know that, Ash knows that, everyone knows that.”

“But I couldn’t save her.” She whimpered.

“I know.” I sighed. “But honestly, there was nothing you could have done to save her. We knew this would happen and it sucks that they waited so long to take her. But at least you can say that when you had the chance to be with her you did everything possible to make sure she was loved. And that’s what matters. That she was loved.”

Her lip quivered slightly as she processed everything said. “Thank you.” She whispered.

I smiled at her as her body fell back into my arms with more tears falling from her swollen eyes.

I unlocked the door to Will’s place with the spare key. I had been calling her all day to check on her after the visit to Trixi’s but she never picked up. I know she’d tell me I had no reason to be worried about her but I still was. I walked into the apartment and was greeted with an eerie silence. I slowly took off my jacket and let it neatly fall on the back of the chair.

Something’s wrong. I thought to myself. I can feel it.

A second later I heard the soft patter of Tiffany’s paws coming down the stairs. “Hey Tiff.” I smiled, dropping down to one knee. She barked softly at me before walking back to the stairs, but she stopped and looked back at me as if to see if I was coming. When I walked closer she pranced up the stairs and looked down at me from the top before barking again.

With each step I took the faint sound of sobs could be heard. I softly pushed open the door to find Will on the floor crying.

“Babe?” My body was still halfway in the doorway. I wasn’t sure if she’d be upset for me being there or not. My voice made a sob catch in her throat as she quickly turned to face me.

“Twon? Wh-what are you doing here?” Her eyes were filled with blood as she tried to wipe some of it away while she stood up from her spot.

“You hadn’t answered my calls. I got worried.” Concern was laced throughout my voice.

“Sorry.” She whispered, her eyes set on the floor.

“Did everything go okay?” I took a few careful steps closer to her. She turned her face away as her lip quivered.

“Do you really think it went okay?” Her voice was harsh. “Her baby was stolen from her.  Nothing about that is okay.”

“I-I know.” I stammered.

“Obviously you don’t!” She massaged the bridge of her nose to calm herself down. After a minute her eyes locked onto the ground.

“I just wish there was some way I could have stopped it.” She muttered. Her hands balled into fists beside her and her eyes shut tight. “I just wish I could of helped her. We shouldn’t of let her stay in the apartment alone last night. I should have slept over. I knew I should of but I didn’t.” Tears ran down her face as the anger inside of her rose more.

“This isn’t your fault, Will.” I tried to grab her hands but she pulled away.

“Yes it is!” She yelled. “I’m the one she confessed everything to. She trusted me with a part of herself that no one knows about. That no one still knows about! And yet I couldn’t even help protect her from getting her daughter taken!”

“Rebel wasn’t yours to protect, Will!” I yelled as I grabbed her shoulders. “She never was!”

She glared up at me with a grimace on her face. “That doesn’t mean I shouldn’t have tried.”

I shook my head. “It also doesn’t mean that it’s your fault. You didn’t do anything wrong, Will.” My grip loosened on her but my hands stayed planted in their spots. “You did everything that you were supposed to and Trixi knows that.”

Her shoulders began to loosen under my hands as she slowly began to process everything I said.

“This wasn’t your fight, Will. It never was.”

“Then why does it hurt so much?” She whispered. She looked up at me as she waited for my response. But her eyes sent a sharp pain through my chest. The agony in them was frightening and if I was alive, it would of made my breath catch in my throat.

“Willow…” My words trailed off as I pulled her into my arms. She buried her face in my chest as our bodies rocked from her sobs. The harder she cried, the tighter my arms wrapped around her until I picked her up to hold her tighter.

I hated seeing her like this and it was something she hated me to see too. She’s the type of person to keep her cool in most situations. Even when something bothers her she puts on a straight face and pretends everything is okay. She hates for people to see her “weak.” She’d rather have people see her yelling than see her crying. So when she does cry around someone, you know something insane happened. I’ve only seen her cry a couple times and when it does happen it pains me to see her.

“I’m sorry.” She whimpered into my neck.

“You didn’t do anything.” I reassured her and kissed her jaw tenderly.

I slowly lowered her back down until her feet were softly on the ground again.

I held her hands in mine as she stared down. “Could you stay with me today?” Her voice was barely above a whisper.

I nodded and kissed the top of her head. “Of course.”

“Thank you.”

I wrapped my arms around her and lead her down the stairs to the couch.

“Why are we going downstairs?” She sniffled.

“I’m not going to let you sit in your room depressed all day.” I said as I searched through her TV cabinet. “Video games or a movie?”

“I don’t really—“

“Oh, come on. Just choose one. Please?” I asked as I turned to face her.

She sighed in defeat and thought about her choices. “Games.” She smiled and wiped more tears away.

I quickly put a game in and grabbed the controllers. “Here you go.” I said as I handed her one before taking a seat. She leaned back into my chest and swung her legs onto the arm of the couch.

“Comfy?” I teased.

“Shut up.” She sniffled while trying to hit me with the controller. “That’s why I’m gonna’ beat you.”

“Just because you’ve been crying doesn’t mean I’ll let you win.” I smirked.

“Jackass.”

We played for hours. I started getting tired after the first half hour but I refused to stop. Not after how happy she looked. Her face still was stained from the tracks of her tears. But seeing the sparkle of her fangs each time she’d smile was worth facing insomnia for.

“Yes!” She shrieked as she threw her hands up in victory. “Suck it, bitch!”

My chest vibrated from my laughter as she threw her fist in the air. “Finally.” I teased.

“Whatever.” She laughed. The feeling of her delicate fingers touched my chin as she pulled it down to face her.

“Thank you, Twon.” She smiled while looking into my eyes. “For everything.”

“I didn’t really do much.”

“You were here for me. And that was enough for me.” Her thumb softly caressed my jaw as she stared up at me.

“I’ll always be here for you, Will.” She wrapped her arm around my neck as I brought my lips down to meet hers.

She closed her eyes and rested her head on my chest. “I love you.” She whispered.

“I love you too.” Her lips spread into a smile as I kissed her head. Before she could resist I picked her up.

“Now let’s get you in bed, sleepy head.” I laughed.

“Only if you stay with me.” She yawned and nestled her head in the crook of my neck.

“I promise.”

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